Surrender in Costa Rica

Platanillo, Costa Rica

It was a peaceful retreat.
A time to cocoon.
6 months in a stillness that settles.

Deep healing.
Releasing the dense. The old.
Space for what needed to emerge.

There were many pastries eaten.
Moments spent sitting and hearing the birds.
It’s the place I’ll forever think of as 100 shades of green.

It gifted us space.
Space for our nervous systems to find a new pulse.
Moments spent creating, dreaming, relating.

But. Relating only with each other.
The daily jungle walks once life giving becoming the same path day after day. The same solitude day after day.

The children were thriving and growing at a local Waldorf school with homeschool barefoot vibes.
Outside of that, life felt a bit like there’s gotta be something more.

My project kept hitting roadblocks. I couldn’t find a space to host The Sovereignty Experiment - my perfectly laid out plan. A 12 month experiment with 6 families, exploring Village Ways. It feels so true but I can’t make it happen.

The pull of Canada making a return.
That old voice.
Come, it will be easier.

And hey, 3 resorts in British Columbia just replied. It’s a shockingly good price for me to host The Experiment back in Canada. Should we book the flight?

Should we go back? A convo on repeat for those first 10 months.

We almost did. Packed it up. Accepted the failure. Things weren’t clicking. *spoiler alert: Things weren’t clicking yet.

There were more lessons to be had and resolve to be found.
And of course, my friend named Divine Timing.

Because when it does happen.
When the stars align and the moment is fated.
It makes everything worth it.

In the chaos, we found our ability to be clear.
In the setbacks, we deepened our ability to persevere.
In the not it’s we refined what it really looks like to us.

It hasn’t been easy.

We have been lonely.
Disoriented.
Having to figure out so. many. new. things!

Savings flying out of our account.
Vehicle troubles.
Critters galore.

Yet something in my Soul, my husbands too, knew.

Stay put.
You belong here.
Here is where you feel most alive.
Here is where you will grow your own veggies year round.
Here is where many families are aligned in values and Ways.
Here is where you will reclaim your families sovereignty.

So we did.
We stayed and found in our deepest reserves.

Self.
Devotion.
Vision so clear.

My project launching before ready.
Mis-alignment in Vision, resonance and Ways.
I plowed ahead when it wasn’t the right Space.
Wrong collaborations. Wrong location.

Hmm that sounds familiar.
I’m fast when obsessed.

My son and I share this gift of tunnel vision Focus.
But this time the not Allowing led me straight into a brick wall.
Woman down, this time I’m not sure I’ll try again.

Despair.
Grief.
Allowing the fall.

Wrong timing.
Again.

Will she get up?
The question remained.
10 days of fog, finally lifting and then…

I surrender.

I find the exhale.

And then.

My ancestors arrive with bells and whistles.
This is time for A Big Show they declare.
My friend Divine Timing has arrived.

Messages and signs.
Things have never felt more clear.
The magic leaves me speechless.

The golden gates flying open.
Arriving into what we’ve been seeking all along.

Resonance.
Alignment in Ways.
Life Giving Connection.

Not a place I’d ever heard of, googled.
In fact a region I’d written off for the climate.
Must live at the beach, a picture in my mind.

But this Surrender thing is working.
And Source has never led me astray.
So let’s give it a go.

Further up the mountain we go.
2 cats, 2 dogs, 2 kids.
The King of the Road taking us into the clouds and away from the Sea.

Our 5th home in Costa Rica.
Our 5th attempt at Home.
But this time Led into a Greater Leap of Faith than ever before.

This is Part 4 in my mini series: Our Family Moving to Costa Rica from Canada 
Begin at Part 1: The Battle + The Threshold Here