The Battle + The Threshold

Our two year journey to exit Life As Prescribed.

I mostly share the good stuff*. So here’s more of the real stuff.

It really was much like fighting our way out of a Prison. Except this was a Prison of our own making.

In 2023 the kiddos and I embarked on a 5 week Odyssey to the West Coast and down the Pacific Coast highway. The moment our feet hit the soil in Salmo, BC something started to happen. Possibilities opened up. I was inspired to consider what a new way of life could look like. I observed my friend’s way of life and pondered my own life. I observed her preserving her food. Sharing with her neighbors. Connected to community. Living simply in a campervan. Immersed in Nature. Visiting the River as a Way of Life.

Something inside of me screamed Remember!

My husbands past Pulls colliding with mine as reignited past dreams, once ignored, activated and not going into hiding again.

There was so much This isn’t it feeling about the life we were living.

What is the quiet longing that’s just always there? Why has this way of life just never

Quite. 

Felt.

It? 

Some It maybe, but not nearly enough of It. 

Why can’t google just tell me what to do. 

Eco village. Remote off grid. West coast. 
Tiny homes. Van life. Overlanding. Enter on the keyboard.  
“Canadians moving to Costa Rica”. “Worldschooling”. “Alternative ed”. 
“How to buy land with friends”. 

I had felt different.

Thus The Pursuit began.

And with The Pursuit, a 2 year battle ensued. A battle to escape a prison of our own making.

Barriers, both real and perceived, making it difficult to become free.

Trapped in payments, commitments and tethers. What will they think? What would we do with our house? Our pets? What about all. our. stuff.

Limitations.
Fears.
The comfort of safety**.

Easier to stay yet the Soul doesn’t lie and no this is not working.

Easy to forget how much it’s not working. Sometimes easier to pretend because the thought of a change seeming so out. of. reach.

Then there’s the distractions, preoccupations, conveniences over Truth, living out of alignment with values.

Overconsumption, disconnection, little time for relating. Fighting against the consciousness of Place.

Marching to the beat of our own drums still yes, but why does it always feel against rather than with the flow.

So we began. A fire lit and a passion ignited.

A period of figuring it out. Questioning things. Reflecting. Hours of our lives dedicated to researching. Sitting on the couch in the evenings browsing real estate listings. Exploring ideas.

We began to work towards a Way Out. Even though the path wasn’t lit yet. Expanded our perspectives. Grew our knowledge. We began to simplify our expenses. Grow our savings. We downsized. Sold a lot of things.

Decluttering, re-organized, setting new intentions around stuff. Always it would return. The cat came back. Instead this time instead of the same stuff returning, more stuff would fill it’s place.

We spent over a year making stuff decisions. Donating. Gifting. Selling. Trashing. Eventually, we got it all down to one corner of a garage.

(Stuff that by the way, we haven’t thought about once since our departure. Agonizing decisions over drill bits or a game of monopoly. Even the things kept now forgotten and I wonder how it was that we ever let this stuff consume so much of our attention.)

Then there was the battle with Self.

Moments of considering if we should just stay. Doubts. Worries. Stress.

Healing to be done and habits to change. Skin to shed and space to open up.

Yet we would always return to Self Belief. Trust in Self. Trust in each other. Following our truths. Encouraging. Supporting.

We would always return to envisioning. We had tasted a Different Way and it became The Only Way.

We didn’t know The Answer yet the pull towards the Unknown getting stronger. Which direction do we aim? Can’t pretend any longer it’s been another year so. let’s. go. 

We went on scouting missions. Spent time getting to know the land in places. The people. Ways of life. Like an observation period. Filing it all away as we let Source lead the way in our explorations. Divine circumstances, invitations, experiences as we toured through the Kootenays, BC mainlands, Vancouver Island and the Gulf Islands.

A night on a sailboat.
A weekend in a tiny home.
Buying a camper and exploring life on the road.

We tried a lot of things. We felt a lot of things. We experimented with Life.

And eventually, not quite ready but the winds of change are blowing, which way do we go?

Steps taken towards a New Place. We would move to the West Coast. It fits our vibe. It’s beautiful and surrounded by nature. We began to plan. Envision. Inspiration was ignited and our vision was focused. We listed our homes for sale. Sold our second vehicle. Paid of debts. Cleaned up our home. One repair at a time. One paint coat at a time. Step by step, brick by brick we focused.

Attempt and falter. Trying to grab a hold. Confusion, fear of the Unknown. Going the wrong direction. Control an illusion and maybe it’s time we just Surrender to the direction of The Pull. 

Gulf Islands maybe not quite it for us. Relief flooding our systems when our perfectly laid out plans get disrupted.

Plot twist after another.
Deepening trust in Self.
Nothing going as planned.

Let’s go to Costa Rica I suggested yet again to my husband. This time met with a smile and a shrug, let’s give it a go.

Source confirms The Path. Our once collapsed house sale reappears the moment we say Yes.

Towards a Great Unknown, the greatest leap yet. And here we go. 

Ready at last to Give. It. All. We’ve. Got. 

Scars new and old, yet feet steady, we. Begin.

Entering the tunnel, on the way to what I call The Threshold.

A right of passage.
A journey of sorts.
A test in commitment, vision, resilience, and resolve.

Once the Big Scary Dream was acknowledged. Accepted. Spoken. Life opened her arms to us and we leapt into Her River. Here barriers dissolve. Magic happens.

Meanwhile, the passageway getting narrower. Glance back at the path behind. Pull of the familiar sounding. so. sweet. Should we retreat? The Resistance the loudest now. Yet pull of Place stronger than ever and this time we continue. We stumble. We fall. Have I always had this many grey hairs? Each step unsteady, unsure, wavering as we ponder the path. Feeling lost. But I can feel it in my bones. Keep going. The path perilous. Crooked the road. Remember my intent.

Making so many mistakes.
Vision is foggy.
We have no back up plan.

Removing the illusion of safety not recommended for the faint of heart because damn that was intense and what have we done?

High winds.
Turbulence.
Dodging the attacks and sometimes getting hit.

Man down and we find refuge.
A warm meal. A sleep. A reminder and a hand.
You’ve got this. Let’s keep going.

Tethers reaching.
Come back, you can’t do this.
Matrix holding on for dear life.

And then, one day, we find ourselves squinting through the debris, on the other side of the threshold we open our eyes to see Life, Beauty, 100 shades of green.

We’ve arrived.

This is Part 1 of 3 in my mini series: Our Family Moving to Costa Rica from Canada 
Read Part 2 Moving to Costa Rica Here
Read Part 3 Platanillo, Costa Rica Here

* Why do you only film the good stuff? A convo with my son that inspired more Truth. Read about it here. 
**But is “real life”  really safe?  I want to write a blog about this one day.